It can be quite traumatising when it comes to being rejected from something you wanted to do. That could be applying for a job, university courses, asking your crush out on a date and many more.
I’ve been rejected plenty of times that I even lost count! This includes jobs that I’ve applied to but only got sent a letter letting me know that my application did not past. I’ve also been rejected to one of the universities that I wanted to go to and the relationships in the past where they would leave me. So was rejected from my own ATAR score (who knew?).
But what we all have in common is that we’ve been rejected before. Many times to count. How have you encountered these rejections? Did you feel anger? Stress? Sadness? Embarrassment?
If so, I’ll be sharing with you guys about what you should do when coping with rejection and how you can learn the reason why you’re being rejected.
So grab your mug of coffee or tea and let’s get right into it!
*Disclosure: This post contains affiliates. I earn a compensation if you buy the product. I only add affiliates that I’ve tried myself and would prefer to you. You do not have to buy the items.*
Take a break
Don’t let yourself continue after being rejected so many times. The more you continue, the more you get rejected, the more likely you’re going to feel somewhat depressed and feel like a failure.
I applied for job interviews last year but ended up getting rejected so many times my self-confidence fell off the roof. It was disappointing, to say the least. I thought to myself “what is the problem? Why am I getting rejected by all these job applications?” Pssk, the least you should know is that I even got rejected twice (years ago and last year) on a Freelancing site. So I stopped applying for job applications until the start of this year.
Take a break so you can fully regenerate yourself from all the heartaches & disappointment you’ve occurred. When you feel like you’re ready to take it on again (and be sure to know that you’re really up for getting hit in the face with a rejection), then go for it.
Allow yourself to deal with this rejection
Don’t even try to hide and swipe it off like it didn’t happen. Acknowledge it. Know that you just got rejected. Know that you’re allowed to cry, be angry, be disappointed, be embarrassed and be all kinds of mixed negative emotions. Allow yourself to let it all out and go face to face with it.
I know this because I use to bottle up my anger so long after being slammed down with a decline. I end up bursting out and crying my eyes out the next day. I’m joking about the crying part but I did get really angry and took it out on people (bad idea on my behalf. Don’t do that.).
You could even try to smash glass empty bottles against the wall (shh don’t tell anyone).
Don’t try to put yourself down
The number one thing that you should be concerned on is not putting yourself down. Because the application already did that for you (ok that’s the last of my sarcasm in this post).
To be frank, you don’t need to tell yourself that you probably got rejected because of how you’re terrible at it blah blah blah. Stop right there! What I’m telling you is to not put your self-esteem down. You’re not terrible, you’re not worse than others and you’re not stupid.
I use to tell myself all the time that I lack experience for the job and that I’m useless or that I just wasn’t good enough for that person. But after a year, I learned that that is no way to treat myself in a situation like that.
Try to talk it 1 on 1 with yourself or someone close in a positive critical way. I don’t know if you feel the same but one time, I told myself “a person with better experience is best suited for the job. I could expand and learn more so that way I can be fitted for another related job”.
Know that a rejection could lead you better things
It’s true! For example J.K Rowling and Steven Jobs. J.K Rowling got turned down 12 TIMES before publishing her manuscript. Now, her Harry Potter series is a huge hit around the world. And Steven Jobs, when he got FIRED in 1985 by his own company that he founded (Apple). Years later, he bought Pixar, which is now known as the top Animation Studios!
I hope that got you inspired. Know that being rejected even happens to the successful people. It’s not the end of the world. Just keep trying and don’t give up. Even after one of the biggest rejection, don’t let that rejection define you.
Learn from your rejection
I think one of the good things about getting rejected a lot is that you learn to deal with it in the future. I use to take it way to the heart but now, I just acknowledge it, fix things that revolve around the rejection and continue to try harder, or something different.
People don’t learn unless they make mistakes. When your break is done, don’t think about the negatives, try your best and continue until you get accepted. If you just got rejected from a relationship, don’t stop looking just because of that one person. Maybe that person wasn’t right for you. Maybe it’s like one of those “fate” movies where you find your soulmate. Who knows?
What you should do now?
Try out these coping mechanisms when you get rejected. The more you rely on this, the better you’re able to cope with being squashed in the face with a basketball (true fact. I did get hit in the face with a basketball when I was in primary school).
Check out Simple Truths for motivational books for business, inspiration, success in how to get through with rejection.
Another thing you could do is check out more sources on rejection here:
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